104. 23.04.2012 Come in no.15 your time is up

104. 23.04.2012 Come in no.15 your time is up

There are a lot of misconceptions in the world. Man United fans assume that fans of every other teams are stupid.  Members of the government think that everyone who didn’t vote for them is stupid (they know that everyone who did vote for them is stark raving baked potato stupid, but they tend to gloss over that little issue).  

Likewis,  dentists think that helpless people with prised open mouths are stupid because a) they pay him ridiculous amounts of money  for  the pleasure of exposing and aggravating  nerve endings  and b) they believe him when he says  ‘this isn’t going to hurt’

People also think that sheep are stupid.  In fact people think that sheep are so stupid that they spray paint on the mums and their babies so that they can find each other in the middle of a busy field.

It seems to work too. Mrs Ewe here being a prime example. Until she had the number 15 sprayed on her back,  she had an endless and thankless task on her cloven hooves  trying to find her little Dick and Dora in the middle of an enclosed, yet large field.  She would spend hours baaing and bleating but could she get Dick and Dora to listen?

Neither Dick nor Dora are considered the brightest sparks of the field, preferring to spend their days bouncing up and down on the spot, tearing around  in ever increasing and sometimes decreasing  circles or chasing each other up and down the field before suddenly stopping  as opposed to receiving a  basic education from a good natured shepherd in a cosy little barn.

However an initiative by the Welsh Assembly, no doubt with vast amounts of  European funding, has been taking place over the last few years to educate lambs and their ignorant mothers. It seems to have paid off  and glowing exam results show that most sheep can now count up to 50 and simple arithmetic  and numerical problems are well within their grasp.

In fact the project has been such a success that the UK government (that’s the one that nobody actually voted for) is so impressed that it is about to roll out the project to Secondary schools across the country.  As David Clegg (or was it Nick Cameron? Or Nick Griffin?)  said “People think I don’t care about the normal people in society, but it’s a sorry state of affairs when a pleb  without a private education has less intelligence than a sheep. I intend to plough several pounds of money into correcting this inbalance. We are, after all,  all in this together”

Postscript: shortly after this picture was taken, Dora was unfortunately  killed  when the blackboard with the day’s algebra problems chalked on it toppled over and crushed her to death.