119. 12.05.2012 Timotei – for body, shine and balance

119. 12.05.2012 Timotei – for body, shine and balance

We planned this meticulously. We’ve known Katy Garner nee Katy Hinderance for long enough to know that pride in personal appearance is fairly low down on her priority. In fact to be brutally frank, she just doesn’t care.

Her hygiene regime usually consists of a quick run through at the BP carwash. Mark (that’s her husband) tethers  her to a pallet on the end of a length of rope and a couple of hefty lads  and a dray horse drag her from rinse to buffer to polish through to  blow.  There is usually a certain amount of uncalled for screaming  and high dramatics,  but no more than can be expected from someone from Lincolnshire.  Normally the promise of a bag of Sports Mixtures, a sherbert dib-dab  and a bottle of  fizzy Vimto from the BP Shop is enough to quieten her down.

Anyhow, when it was known that Katy was coming we decided that the falls at Abergwyngregyn (that’s Aber falls for the lazy) was the place Katy would be viewing. Closely.

Those of you of a certain age will remember the Timotei advert which featured the woman washing her locks under a waterfall. Well, Timotei wasn’t available but we did have a bottle of Stardrops under the sink. It’s good on limescale, grime and build ups. Just the thing.

An hour later, the new, sparkling Katy Garner appeared from the plunge pool looking like a picture of spring health. Miracles can happen.

Oddly enough as we walked up to the falls a chap, a rather shifty looking chap to be brutally frank  stopped John and pointed vaguely in my direction and said something about facebook. (John is unclear as to what exactly was said, and it’s like getting blood out of a stone) but the man in question had seen me first, not recognised me without my TV makeup, then spotted John and put one and one together. I didn’t have a pen for an autograph though.  Honestly, I don’t get a minute’s peace.

Pleased to have met you Nick J !!

Right, must dash, Katy needs a rub down with something..... happen  the old horse blanket in the back shed will do.